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This is the only time you will want to look at the past for proof!
Let me show you how to use this as an amazing way to build your confidence!!
Let’s get this amazing past-proof party started!!
We often look at the past…
It’s just a reflex of the brain!
We would do things we did in the past, we will say things we said in the past just because in our brain’s eyes (which is quite funny to say it like this!), we are still alive so it’s a “good thing” to do the same things again and to say those same things again!!
The brain always wants to be efficient!
It’s not going to reinvent the wheel each time, creating new thoughts, creating new supportive stories, it will simply repeat the past!
If you are still alive today, what your brain thinks is the following “they are alive today because of doing this and thinking this, so let’s do that again!!”
So, again, no matter what you’ve done or said, it’s going to simply repeat it because you’re alive today so by a+b, your brain will offer you the same thoughts and the same stories that you already thought once!
It’s just a question of being pragmatic and efficient!
Let’s not get mad at our brains for braining! It just wants to keep us alive!!
It has good intentions!!
When looking at the past…
The big problem here is that we look at the past usually to blame ourselves or to beat ourselves up.
We think for example “I always had that bad habit so I’ll probably always have it!” or “I’ve never been consistent at not overeating so… I’ll probably go back to overeating even if I try not to!”
We often use the past against ourselves, to find the mistakes we’ve done, to find proof that we indeed, aren’t worthy, aren’t extraordinary…
This is one way to look at the past!
Just pay attention to how you are FEELING when you think about the past.
If you feel more “negative”/uncomfortable emotions, it’s probably not serving you to think about the past this way…
Listen to how I think it will be more beneficial to use your past!!
Use it for AMAZING PROOF!
What do I mean by that??
I mean that when you doubt yourself in a specific situation, look at the proof in the past that you DID succeed at it, that you were CONFIDENT at a certain moment in this specific situation!!
For example, facing a problem or a situation you did not wish to be in.
Think of one time it happened and how you handled it!
Looking back at it you can think “Yeah, I really did GREAT in that situation, in the end, I did solve that problem!”
And it doesn’t have to be “solving a problem”, it could be about your attitude at the moment, your resilience to be calm and to handle the situation the best that you can!
Think also about a time you felt very insecure and how it passed after a bit of time, I’m not saying you necessarily went to feeling SUPER confident but at least, you went to a more neutral place!
For sure, we can all find proof in our past for SUCCESS, it’s just that we don’t automatically do it! Remember that your brain has a tendency to look at things in a negative way because it wants to protect you from danger, always! It’s just wired like this!!
I used this technique of looking for POSITIVE proof of the past recently with myself and also in a coaching session with a client.
We often want that what we are doing/working on will be perfect!
It’s coming from a good place! We want to put all the chances on our side and do it amazingly!
At this moment, it’s very important to realize that we did many things in the past and when you think about it, it’s always been enough, always!!
Can you think of any time like this?! Studying for an exam, making that presentation?
For SURE you can find success stories if you’re willing to!!
Practically speaking!
So now, think of one situation in your life (health, relationships, habits…), something that you keep on looking at the past for proof of having actually failed.
Of course, there’s nothing wrong with failing (outside of the feeling!) and it’s not a FACT to fail, it’s very subjective but here, I want you to see, to be more conscious of how looking at the past with these glasses (beating yourself up, blaming yourself) hasn’t been useful until now.
Now, with the same situation in mind, look for and find more proof of how you were successful!!
Also, it’s very funny because I coach a lot of people on being consistent, etc., and I love sharing that when you procrastinate a lot, you are actually very consistent at… Not taking action! 😉
SEE! You can always find THE proof in the past that it has somehow always worked, that you were successful at it in certain situations even if it doesn’t look like this…!
This way of finding USEFUL proof will always help you build your confidence!!
Because you’ll build on success and will get the habit of stopping to use your past against yourself but to use it FOR yourself!! Game changer! 😉
You’ve got this!!
And if you want us to discuss it together and see where you are and where you want to be instead, book your FUN & FREE consultation!!
Let’s get this coaching party started!!
