Do you want to overcome low self-esteem and insecurities?
Discover and use these 6 strategies that helped my clients overcome low self-esteem in no time!
You’re not alone! 🙂
We never learned at school how to improve self-esteem!
This is why I wrote that article.
These 6 Simple Strategies on how to overcome low self-esteem can surely help you attain high self-esteem.
High self-esteem is achieved by knowing your own worth.
It is also achieved by believing that you have the power to change your own world through the help of positive mental attitudes (PMA). Thus, by learning these simple tips, you can overcome the following 5 signs of low self-esteem:
- Frequently comparing yourself to others,
- Being uneasy with compliments,
- Easily giving up on something,
- Focusing on the things that you can’t control,
- Having an unhealthy self-image.
Low Self-esteem is Rooted in Negative Mental Habits!
“Habits are like a cable. We weave a strand of it every day and soon it cannot be broken,” according to Horace Mann.
But can we not really break a bad habit? I think Horace Mann was wrong when he said: “soon it cannot be broken!”
Why? Because you can surely break a habit, especially, that of a negative habit.
Stephen Covey once said that “habits can be learned and unlearned.”
So, you need not be despondent if you have low self-esteem, for although it is not easy to break out of low self-esteem, it is not unbreakable. Yet, it would require a great commitment on your part to undo this negative mental attitude.
Always remember that anything that is worth having is also worth working for.
High self-esteem is worth having because of your happiness and success hinge on it! 🙂
Thus, it is worth working for!
Now, if you are truly desirous of ridding yourself of low self-esteem symptoms, you can follow these 6 simple tips:
1. Believe in Yourself and Use Positive Affirmation!
No one in this world will believe in you so much than yourself!
Hence, if you can convince yourself that you are truly important, you will become important.
“You are the most important person in this world,” said W. Clement Stone, and this idea should make you happy. You’re unique! From the very first moment of your conception, you are already a winner by winning the race towards your mom’s egg cell! ‘;)
So, if you still doubt your self-worth, you should, by now, upon hearing the abovementioned statements at least believe that you are important.
Now, if your mind is still deeply affected by the cobwebs of pessimism and self-doubt, you should recite daily this affirmation: “I am a unique and unlimited being. I can create anything I want.
Everything that does not allow that to show up, I am now willing to let go, destroy, and uncreate.”
As you repeat this affirmation daily and as its meaning sinks into your subconscious, you will surely overcome the negative mental attitudes (NMA) that contribute to your low self-esteem.
Remember words are powerful, and all the words that come out of your mouth could really sink into your subconscious without you being aware of it. They can transform your life.
So better watch out what you say and say only good things about yourself.
2. Work on your Circle of Influence!
I want to make this tip very important because I believe that everything else about overcoming signs of low self-esteem in a man or signs of low self-esteem in a woman hinges on this one simple principle.
You may be asking by now what this Circle of Influence is. I myself can no longer wait to explain it to you in my own limited capacity.
In life, according to Stephen Covey, there are basically two important Circles—the Circle of Concern and the Circle of Influence.
The Circle of Concern include everything that you cannot control such as the weather, the opinions of others, your boss, politics, the future, the reactions of others, etc.
The Circle of Influence, on the other hand, involves all the things that you can control such as your mind, yourself, your habits, your perception, and your time.
I like how Chris Bergen illustrated it in his article Sharpen Your Focus And Accomplish Any Goal With A Circle Of Influence Exercise:
When you think about it…
If you focus more on your Circle of Concern, you will only get frustrated. Why? Because as much as you want to take control of the things within that circle, your effort will surely be thwarted.
You don’t have influence, for example, on what others might say and think about you. You don’t control the weather! You don’t have perfect control of your boss’ opinions! And if you want to control them, you will only get frustrated.
If you always focus on the things that you cannot control, you’ll end up being a worrier and a loser. Eventually, you will end up with very low self-esteem. Moreover, your language will always be characterized by “If only I have…” statements like the following:
- “If only I have this…I would be successful!”
- “If only I have a degree…I would be able to find great well-paying jobs!”
- “If only I am handsome…I would be famous!”
- “If only it is not raining…I would not be late!”
- “If only I was born rich…”
On the other hand, if you work on your Circle of Influence, you will end up with very high self-esteem.
Why? Because you are working on the things that you can control. Your very own self, for example, is the only thing that you can perfectly control. “Always remember that real success is the success with yourself!” It cannot be otherwise.
Thus, if you work on yourself, you become your own master. You can either choose to improve it or destroy it. Like a master, you can dictate your time and your schedule. You can decide which habits to develop and which habits to break. Your daily talks would be filled with “I can” statements like the following:
- “I can find a solution to it.”
- “I can control my mind!”
- “I can fix my schedule!”
- “I can do it!”
- “I can control my reaction towards others!”
Thus, you become the creator of your life. You can eke out the course of your life! 🙂
You are no longer a victim of circumstances or what others would say to you. You then lessen your worries. Moreover, you will begin to achieve small successes that would eventually become huge!
With these small successes, you will start to strongly believe in yourself and ultimately exhibit the signs of high self-esteem.
3. Stop Comparing Yourself to Other People.
You know how much I love that topic! 🙂
I created a whole guide on How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others.
There is no virtue in comparing yourself to other people. 🙁
In fact, comparing yourself to others will only make you unhappy in this life.
This “comparison trap” is bad enough and can be very debilitating to your self-esteem. It is also the root cause of jealousy which most of us call “a green-eyed monster.” It is also bad because it confuses or muddles your self-image.
Obviously, the comparison trap brings in a pandora of mental negativities that would soon form into negative mental habits if continuously nurtured.
So, you should nip these mental habits in the bud by not comparing yourself to others. Instead, it is better to work on gaining good mental habits and good qualities! Improve yourself as much as possible. Develop new skills and good habits and soon you will have high self-esteem.
4. Learn to Laugh!
Laughter is the great medicine, and surely this is true! 🙂
Laughter triggers the release of serotonin and endorphins which are feel-good hormones. These hormones are responsible for creating feelings of happiness and love. Hence, if you want to cure yourself of the gnawing effects of low self-esteem, you should laugh more often.
Laughter seems to be the easiest way to boost your sense of self-worth. It can change your mood instantaneously from a negative to a positive one. It can also immediately change your perception of things.
It can also change your environment because laughter is contagious. Moreover, the good thing is that when you laugh, you are truly working on your Circle of Influence because you can choose to laugh, and laughter is good for your well-being.
5. Stop Becoming a Great Pleaser of Other People!
If you always want to please other people, you are maybe lacking in emotional strength. This means that you are not yet emotionally independent. You want to please others because you want their approvals, and their disapprovals will cause you emotional instability.
It’s hard to be emotionally dependent on other people. The reason is obvious—if those to whom you are emotionally dependent hurt you and reject you, you would be emotionally down. Your self-esteem utterly crushed likewise.
On the other hand, an emotionally independent person is a mature person—someone who doesn’t rely heavily on the approval of other people.
You should instead love yourself and be authentic. Learn to say “no” and mean it. You should bear in mind that you have choices. Remember that your self-worth should not be based on what others think about you.
Have a look at my post and podcast episode 5 Steps To Saying No Effectively and remember that you always have a choice! 🙂
6. Take Responsibility for All Your Actions!
Be responsible! I really LOVE the topic of responsibility!
Responsibility means “response-ability.” It is the ability to choose your response. You will sometimes in your life let other people down by your decisions and choices whether it is intentional or not.
But don’t you worry about it. If it is your choice, then, you are responsible for it and its consequences, and you don’t need to make excuses.
Instead of regretting what had happened, focus then on repairing the damage and always be ready to say that you are sorry if you made a mistake. Apologizing when you have truly made a mistake is a true sign of emotional maturity.
When you take responsibility for your decisions and actions, you keep commitments. You keep commitments to others and to yourselves. And if you can keep commitments, you become effective. As you become more effective, you strengthen your self-esteem and raise it up a notch higher.
How to Know that You Have a Low Self-esteem?
You don’t need to take a low self-esteem quiz to know if you have low self-esteem. You simply need to listen to your self-talk to know if your self-esteem is low. Once you’ve figured out that you have low self-esteem, you should engage in building self-esteem activities by practicing the abovementioned simple tips.
Have a look at my post and podcast episode 6 Ways to Use Positive Self-Talk for Success so you can build the success you deserve! 🙂
To sum up!
As mentioned above, always remember that anything that is worth having is also worth working for.
High self-esteem is worth having because your happiness and success hinge on it. It is, therefore, worth working for. So, you must challenge yourself.
I really hope that these tips were useful to you and that it showed you that you are not less good THAN ANYONE! 🙂
You can do this, I’m 100% sure!! 🙂
To your HIGH self-esteem! 😉
