You’ve been worrying from time to time… It happens to all of us!
You’re looking for tips and tricks on how to worry less?
No need to look further, I’ve gathered all the ways for you to feel less worried about starting today!
Do you want to hear more of my accent?! Discover all episodes here!! 🙂
Why do we worry?
Let’s start at the beginning: it’s important to understand why we worry first…
I really like the way Seth J. Gillihan explained it in his article about worrying.
He’s showing that: “worry, → nothing bad happens.”
By saying this, he’s proving that when we worry, we are trying to reassure ourselves that nothing bad will happen, as long as we worry.
And he gives 5 beliefs that are consistently in our heads (the red sentences are his exact words):
✓ If I worry, I’ll never have a bad surprise.
By saying this, he says that we will never be surprised (and be maybe disappointed) because we will always have thoughts on how things can go (wrong or good by the way!).
✓ It’s safer if I worry.
This is about superstition.
We feel that we need to prevent bad things from happening. Because we always did this! So we are afraid of the consequences of not doing it like we always used to…!
✓ I show I care by worrying.
This is so interesting… He’s saying that if don’t worry, it means that we aren’t caring actually, and that worrying is showing that we care and love what’s around us.
✓ Worrying motivates me.
This is about being productive. It’s again another belief about the fact that we wouldn’t be productive if we aren’t worried.
✓ Worrying helps me solve problems.
People often think that they are finding solutions to their problems while worrying.
Actually, we need to make sure that we aren’t losing a lot of time worrying and not taking action about it.
I mean, it’s easy to worry and not change anything to the current situation.
But to resolve a problem, first you need to notice the problem, then maybe worry about how to solve it, but then, you definitely need to take action.
For sure, people may think that merely worrying about problems may solve their worries.
What do you need help with?
(Choose between the 2 options)
Depression and anxiety
In this post, I won’t be talking about depression, anxiety symptoms, anxiety attacks, or even anxiety disorder.
I first wanted to include also a paragraph about it, but it’s such a big and interesting subject that I cannot just write a small paragraph about it!
I have a post on that topic called Dealing with Depression: Symptoms & How to Help Someone You Care About.
But since I’m not an expert, let me share with you a few more resources! 🙂
If you’re interested in reading about anxiety, I highly recommend having a look at the website of ADDA, which is the Anxiety and Depression Association of America.
You can find many useful answers to all the questions you may have. You can even contact them, do not hesitate!
Also, I really liked this article Depression | Recognizing Depression, Causes, and Treatments. It’s a very complete guide and it offers you great and straightforward information on how and what to do.
I received a few emails from readers asking me if I can talk about stress relief and stress management. Just to tell you that this is also a fascinating subject and I will definitely think about it in the future! 🙂
People telling you, “stop worrying!”
Probably, you heard many people telling you that you should not worry.
If it was that easier, I wouldn’t look for ways to stop worrying, and I wouldn’t write this post 😉
So, I’m just here to tell you that it’s okay that you are worrying. And that the only thing to do is to try:
- Working on the causes.
Let’s face it. For example, if you’re worried about your health, you can already start by trying to eat healthier, by doing some exercise, walking a bit outside… I know again, it’s easier to say than to do but… You have to start somewhere and somehow 😉
- Reading this list over and over again.
It won’t change between today and tomorrow. You need to believe in these ways, and slowly slowly, they will stay in your head and will make the rules up there 🙂
- Working on the causes.
The 15 ways to worry less
✓ Imagine your future self, when you will look back at your life…
It’s not easy, but it definitely can help.
Imagine the day you will look back at your life: what are you looking at?
There are probably worries that won’t be relevant if you have an overall view of all of this. Sometimes, we are so 100% in the situation that it’s hard for us to look at from a more general point of view.
This is why you need to imagine your future self.
✓ Start saying ‘NO’ to people
We are always afraid of saying ‘NO’ to people.
That we may disappoint people and that they won’t love us anymore.
I’m always trying to remind myself that it’s okay to say ‘NO.’ Because what does it mean, to say no?
You need to think of what you’re saying yes when you’re saying no.
For example, you want to relax after work and not go straight to some bar, even if you really want to spend time with friends at bar, the timing isn’t the best for you, at the end of a long day at work.
When you say politely “no,” you actually mean “yes to going home and relax from a long day.”
But we are so afraid of saying “no” and that it would mean that we don’t love them or that they won’t if we say no.
The moment that you start saying “no,” you won’t worry about your commitment to all of it.
Because you understand what’s important! You will realize saying ‘no’ will not destroy anything the way you imagined.
The moment you say “yes to go out, yes to take care of your pet, yes to help organize this event,” it can make sense that you will worry about all of what you say you will do/be a part of it!
✓ Talk to someone about it
Sometimes, you will feel better just to talk about all of your worries with someone.
The moment you do that, you will maybe realize what worry makes more sense and which one is more a habit or an “unnecessary” worry because it’s not taking you anywhere.
When I’m saying this, I mean that worries are good if they are making you take action on things.
But if there are simply filling your mind and your head, we need to find other things to think about! 🙂
✓ Imagine if someone was sharing these worries with you
It’s always so easy to advise other people but ourselves! 🙂
So, start imagining that someone comes to you and sharing with you the same worries you have in your head.
What would you tell this person?
Sometimes, to change position is helping us to give another perspective on things, try it, you’ll be surprised how different we may be and act if it’s to us or someone else! 🙂
✓ Take action, try and try again
I think that a bit of worry can make us realize what is important to us.
Then, we can imagine how to solve this situation and how it will make us feel.
This should lead to taking action, so we aren’t going to worry anymore.
For example, you might be looking for a job. You might be worried about not finding a job.
As hard as it is, the most important is to take action (continue looking for a job), and at some point, you may find a job and stop worrying about it.
So, always take action, and if this action isn’t bringing the result that you want, you need to try something else, never give up. Giving up is not your quality! 🙂
✓ Zoom out
We have so much in our head that it’s hard to look at things from a different angle.
But we need to try to open the perspective, to zoom out of our current situation, and to give it a new look.
In a month from now, in a year, 2 years, would it still be that relevant? Think!!! 🙂
✓ Empty your mind
Sit down, lie down, no matter where, close your eyes, and try to listen to all the thoughts and feelings you’re having.
Sometimes, just sitting here and trying to be in the present can help.
We’re often having tons of thoughts that are making us feel a certain way, but if we slow down a bit, we may start to feel a bit better and a tiny bit less stressed about the whole situation.
I’m not too much into the sport 😉 , but for sure, doing some sport and getting some of this energy out is a fantastic way to worry less.
When I feel anxious, and I didn’t do too much or didn’t go out, I like walking a bit, I feel all my body moving, and I’m getting more energy also.
✓ Embrace uncertainty (even if it’s scary)
I know it’s easy to say, but would you like to know what will be tomorrow (well tomorrow maybe yes, me too!), in a year from now, in 5 years?
There is something also scary about knowing what will happen… right? 🙂
You must accept uncertainty if you want to move forward in your life.
✓ Write about it
Writing your thoughts and worries on the paper will help you get some perspective on how you’re feeling and what you’re thinking of.
I don’t like too much to write, I feel like my thoughts are very personal, etc., but I definitely believe that it’s helping A LOT to see our thoughts on the paper.
It’s bringing a distance that we sometimes need to look at things differently.
✓ Live in the present
When you think about it, you will always worry about what happened in the past or what will in the future.
But what about right here, right now?
It’s not easy at all, but I think that we could worry so much less if we are living more in the present.
Besides, why worry about tomorrow when you can enjoy today?
✓ Have a plan
If you are worried about something, it means that you want something to happen.
So, have a plan on how you want this thing to happen: create a situation, make a call, talk to someone about it, and create a plan on how you’re going to achieve it.
The moment you have a plan, you will worry less because you know you’re taking care of the concern you have.
✓ Draw your situation and write the results of all possibilities
I love doing that: taking a paper and writing down in circles what I’m thinking about and then, drawing arrows with what will happen in each case scenario.
I love it because it’s really giving a general view of how things are going to go depending on the decision I make.
The moment I need to take the decision or make a choice won’t be easy 😉 , but at least, I’m not worried or concerned about how things will go, I know that already.
✓ Don’t Google it
This is the worse we can do! 😉
I mean, at least health talking, I’m not sure that checking online our symptoms and trying to make a diagnostic is a good idea…!
You need to be the judge and decide what can be excellent being Googled and what is maybe not going to bring the best result possible, which can make you worry even more…!
To change your mind and to worry less, you can read an excellent book.
Fictional or about personal development, it will make you think about something else for sure, and then, you’ll worry less. 🙂
Also, reading helps millions of people so that it might help you too!
Three things we all worry about…
You have already found the simplest yet effective methods to worry less. But this is about three things that make you worry! Of course, I should have mentioned these things first, but I saved them for the latter part of the post. Do you know why?
Once you understand the ways to worry less, you will not even find these three things necessary. And when you read this now, you can check whether what I said is true or not. Shall we give it a try? So, here are three things:
Am I right?
Why do you think that we worry so much about the things that we don’t have to worry about? Let’s see!
If you think about it, you will realize that you have given money the liberty to control you. Do you think it is right? Not at all!
You should separate your money and emotions in some way or the other. If you understand the concept of earning, you will get everything clearly. Aren’t poor people happy? Aren’t rich frustrated? Don’t poor people feel safer than rich people? So, how can we say that money is everything?
If you understand the deeper meaning, you can go ahead in life without worrying too much about money. Of course, you should make money, pay bills, go on tour, and do everything else. But you shouldn’t let money control your life and emotions. The moment you made it happen, worries increase.
Actually, money is something that comes and goes. Sometimes it might go unexpectedly, so you can’t cling on to it. You should relax and treat it like it should be treated.
Who says you shouldn’t worry about your health? This can be your question, but trust me, you’ve got it wrong. People are not asked to “worry” about their health. Instead, they have been asked to “take care” of their health. You must understand the difference between these terms.
The more you worry, the unhealthier you become. Do you want it to happen? If you watch motivational videos, you will see how people overcome the health challenges they face. And that will help you focus on your health better. You will understand the taking of your body is better than worrying about it.
For example, you can opt for a healthy diet or get a gym membership. Do something that makes your body better and healthy! 🙂
Or, if you are worrying about diagnosis, you have to think proactively. Try to connect with the ones who can resonate with you. The ones who connect to should be the ones you look up to. They should be living examples of good health above diagnosis.
Lastly, be appreciative of your positive changes, even if they are small.
Finally, the most problematic yet essential things in life. People need love, but that doesn’t mean you can worry when you can’t get it.
There is only one method to worry less about ‘love.’ What is it? You have to accept that the world is full of love so that you can find it anywhere.
If you need love, you should give love, feel love, and praise love.
Love begins within you and ends nowhere! 🙂
The worry less quotes that you need to hear
I simply LOVE these quotes:
To sum up!
We saw that stopping worrying isn’t something very easy to do.
But you can set yourself free of worries if slowly slowly, you’re doing something about it! 🙂
It doesn’t need to be that way and I’m 100% convinced that you can take action and worry less on the long run!
But just so you know, you are really not alone! I totally hear you and I’m there for you! 🙂
You may also be interested in…
- 8 Self-Confidence Examples to Help You Live Your Best Life
- How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others, The Complete Guide
- 10 Burning Questions About Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem
- 7 Ways To Boost Your Self-Confidence